Monkey/Ape Child

My son has an artisan type personality (monkey!).  I always joke that it would be pretty boring around our house if he wasn't around.  I can still see him as a toddler, standing on tip toe, reaching for the front door handle - all he wanted to do was go outside, because it's an adventure!  Artisans want to enjoy every moment of their life!

Wouldn't you know it, tonight as I was talking on the phone about what I was going to write on this very blog post, Steven was demanding my attention.  I'm sure you've experienced this.  You are in a completely separate room doing something by yourself.  Last check, your artisan child was busy doing something somewhere else.  Somehow they have this sixth sense that tells them that you are not paying attention to them.  He comes and stands right next to me - of course arms and shoulders touching me - holding his science notebook and pencil, and of course talking non-stop about who knows what, but it's so important that he has to tell me right now while I'm on the phone.

I try to ignore him - he'll get the hint, right?
No, then, somehow there happens to be a bicycle bell within his reach and, you guessed it, he starts to ring it......and ring it.....until I hang up the phone and take it away.

He won.

I have to thank him, though.  He managed to demonstrate so many of the artisan/monkey misbehaviors wrapped in one little two minute package.

So often, the mistaken goal of these artisans is they are seeking revenge.  This of course can bring out the impatient and critical parent that will just make matters worse.  There are many other ways to deal with these busy artisans.

The most important thing is to accept that they need independence.  That truly motivates them and they will always decide what they want to do and stop at nothing to get it.

I'm sure you guardian/bear type parents are thinking "But they just have to do what I tell them."  But remember, they are not motivated the same way you are. They don't just follow the rules because they are supposed to - they're different!

The choice is yours.  You have to think differently about how to approach the situation. Maybe you have something very important to do and your child wants to do something else.  Instead of getting more and more irritated with them since they won't leave you alone, you might say something like : "OK.  I know you really want ______ right now, so how about we do that, but after we're done, you owe me 30 minutes of quiet so I can get this finished."
I can't tell you how many times this has worked with my child and many of my students.  Rewards and gifts also motivate the artisan child.

More tomorrow!!!

Opportunity

Tonight I had the pleasure of watching a former classmate deliver the keynote speech at the Democratic National Convention.

I thought about what he said about opportunity.  He talked about when he and his twin brother went to Stanford and Harvard - how they were surrounded by the brightest folks in the world - and how he thought about his classmates back at Thomas Jefferson High School.  That we (yes, I went to school with Julian Castro) had the same brains and same dreams as those attending Stanford and Harvard - the difference was opportunity.

Doesn't every child deserve the opportunity to reach their dreams?

I listened and watched and was so proud.

Proud of all of the wonderful people of the west side community around Jefferson HS who have supported the Castro brothers and many others (all those BBQ plate fundraisers!!!)

Proud of the fabulous teachers at my alma mater - who gave all of us a foundation for our success in life.

Proud of Rosie Castro - the single mother who worked so hard to provide for her sons.

And of course proud of both successful sons - Julian and Joaquin.

I know that opportunity does matter - but amazing things still can happen....
                   
                                                           by working together with compassion and love.

The Power of One Song

So...be honest... how many hours have you spent watching  the Olympic Games on TV?  There have been amazing races, disappointing scores, and unexpected wins.  Of course, we are at the mercy of NBC about how much or how little we actually see of different events.  What I noticed, however, was that one event is never cut short  -  
                          the playing of the various national anthems from around the world.

Watching these amazing athletes standing on the podium as they listen or sing along to their country's song is a glimpse into their spirit.  They can usually hold it together when they have won - but the music always wins in the end.  That's what keeps us watching -  to see their raw emotions spill out as the song echoes through the air.  It speaks to all of us - no matter what country or what athlete.  You see all their dedication, hard work, sacrifice, competitive drive, amazing resilience, and humanity . . . but all you hear is music. 

This is a moment that makes me so proud to be part of the Yamaha Music Foundation.  

         "From the earliest days of human history, music has been one
          of the most natural and artistic forms of human expression.
          It has moved people throughout the ages.
          Yamaha Music Foundation strives to convey the joy of music
          across cultural and national boundaries, and to enhance the
          sensibility that allows people the freedom of expression through music.
          In so doing, we hope to contribute to the creation of a
          brighter and happier world."

          Shuji Ito
          President
          Yamaha Music Foundation